And no, Banalicious Hero, I was saying that people my age around here usually dont go out for tea or something.
You might have meant that, but what you said was
Quote from Anubis_Ravenheart »
Besides, I dont really drink coffee, and tea isn't really my thing all the time...
so you can see where I got the idea. Anyways, what your problem amounts to is your self-image. You can get over it and talk to this girl, and laugh at your old self regardless of her reaction, or you can keep making excuses to avoid talking to her, blame your intimidation on her superpowers and hate yourself as you continue to repeat the pattern with other women. It has nothing to do with the girl; she could be any other chick and you'd be in the same situation. It's about your choice.
Ah, sorry, I meant to put "and tea isn't really my thing (or anyone else's at my age) all the time. But alas, I bemoan my scatteredness. Sorry.
Eh, I suppose you do have a point there. I usually tend to have this problem with anyone I like, (and sometimes even just with women in general, whether I like them or not) I guess it stems from a fear that I will be seen by them as being annoying or creepy somehow.
Eh, I suppose you do have a point there. I usually tend to have this problem with anyone I like, (and sometimes even just with women in general, whether I like them or not)
Don't feel bad; it's very common. I went through it. But the sooner you realize you're the only one who cares about changing it (and the only one with the ability, besides), the better.
Quote from Anubis_Ravenheart »
I guess it stems from a fear that I will be seen by them as being annoying or creepy somehow.
And what? Its just awkward and it's not like I'm one of her good friends or really even talk to her, and I assume if I did it might be pretty obvious I'm interested in her (Actually, it's already prolly pretty obvious) which I fear she would consider as creepy. Idk, I just have a bad habit of assuming that situations like this will leave me looking creepy or being annoying.
I hear you man. Took me forever to get anywhere with this stuff.
Have you ever seen that movie with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore called 50 first dates? That is what's up. Try to pretend like your girl has memory loss, and she'll forget completely what happened the previous day.
That's how you've got to approach it. If you can trick your brain into believing it long enough then you'll be loose and confident when you approach her, you'll be "yourself", no fear because there's no consequences.
And what? Its just awkward and it's not like I'm one of her good friends or really even talk to her, and I assume if I did it might be pretty obvious I'm interested in her (Actually, it's already prolly pretty obvious) which I fear she would consider as creepy. Idk, I just have a bad habit of assuming that situations like this will leave me looking creepy or being annoying.
If I understand correctly, you
A) like this girl, but are afraid that she might know you like her if you talk to her, and
B) are worried that this girl--who is not your friend and who you don't really talk to--will feel awkward.
For a worst-case scenario, that seems pretty mild to me.
Also, why wouldn't you want her to know that you like her? So you can go on liking her behind her back, without fear of her approval or lack thereof, avoiding all consequences at the small expense of sacrificing any chance of a relationship you might have? Now that's creepy.
I think it's safe to say that all of us have been in your situation in some way.
For example, there was this pretty girl in many of my classes. She was always with some guy (who later was revealed to be in the dreaded friend zone). Then one day, I saw that he wasn't there, so there was an empty spot next to her. I gathered all my courage, more or less "dropped" my all-present fear, and just went to sit next to her. Everything after that went perfectly smooth, and not long after she became my girl.
The lesson: thinking about it makes things harder and harder, you just have to do it.
Worst case scenario: you lose your dream. Best case scenario: you live your dream!
Yep - listen to Nike... Just Do It. Seriously... as Flappy said, we've all been in that situation. In the end, one of these times you'll gather the courage, say hi and have a nice conversation. It might as well be now 'ay?
Despite my previous "suggestions", a simple, friendly chat is often the best. Sit next to her, smile and say hi. Let it continue from there.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Temporarily retired from the game
Thanks a bunch to Rivenor from Miraculous Recovery Signatures for the awesome sigpic!
Check it out, this worked for a friend of mine, practice on strangers . Get the hang of your game by like hitting on a few random girls till you see what works for you, and you are more comfortable starting the conversation , because i honestly think the first few sentences are the hardest part, once you actually start the conversation its all about not messing it up, once your actually talking to them you just play up what you have in common and avoid talking about things they will be unable to relate to, another approach would be to invite her to some sort of event or hang out, probably with your friends around or with other people, not like a movie or something but someplace where you can talk and get to know each other better without her feeling the pressure or obligation of a date.
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
I don't understand all this Morphling hype, to me they are just lightning bolt fodder
Ooh, ooh... and if they ask what grade you're in, from experience, then they're interested. Well, at least every girl I've been out with asked me that early in our first conversations :/ Especially at our age (14-15 yeah?), when you get older, they don't care as much (as long as you evidently don't have grandchildren, and that is - only if you're not a billionaire as well).
At our age they get stern and awkward talkings to about the birds and the beas and protection if they go out with anyone older... so, its often their first question
Private Mod Note
():
Rollback Post to RevisionRollBack
Temporarily retired from the game
Thanks a bunch to Rivenor from Miraculous Recovery Signatures for the awesome sigpic!
This happens to me all the time, and you would be surprised with how many girls later on in life told me if you would have just had the courage to go up to me I would have gone out to you but now I like somebody else and you lost your chance.
Just do it and even if you mess up it will help you in the future
Well, I just pathetically glanced over at her at times and chickened out to talk to her.. *bangs head on wall*
Pathetic.
Don't beat yourself up too much. If you're afraid of screwing it up with this girl, then take baby steps and chat up some other girls whom you haven't put on a pedestal. That'll give you some practice for the real thing.
Hmm, maybe... Idk, I guess I'll just take it in baby steps... 2morrow I'll focus on trying to actually hold eye contact (which has been barely 2 seconds before I realize that yes she's looking at me and oh god I better turn around.)
Hmm, maybe... Idk, I guess I'll just take it in baby steps... 2morrow I'll focus on trying to actually hold eye contact (which has been barely 2 seconds before I realize that yes she's looking at me and oh god I better turn around.)
No.
You stop thinking and jump in. You don't conquer fear and anxiety by listening to fear and anxiety, you conquer it by running at the thing that's scary.
This happens to me all the time, and you would be surprised with how many girls later on in life told me if you would have just had the courage to go up to me I would have gone out to you but now I like somebody else and you lost your chance.
Just do it and even if you mess up it will help you in the future
QFT'd. I'm still very much in love with my best friend(shes a girl). We became friends because I was trying to find a way to ask her out, and by the point I had I was firmly in the friend zone. Now we're like family but it's physically the most stressful and tiring experience you could ever imagine. She told me flat out it would never happen and if I had asked like a year before hand we would have gone out. Now I have to see her every other day usually with some other guy and fake like I'm happy for her, meanwhile wanting to beat this guy to the ground for "stealing my girl" all the while I have my own girlfriend(and others in past, even when i was working up the courage to ask). It's the worst thing I've ever done with my life(and I'm tempted to start my own thread about it at times).
QFT'd. I'm still very much in love with my best friend(shes a girl). We became friends because I was trying to find a way to ask her out, and by the point I had I was firmly in the friend zone. Now we're like family but it's physically the most stressful and tiring experience you could ever imagine. She told me flat out it would never happen and if I had asked like a year before hand we would have gone out. Now I have to see her every other day usually with some other guy and fake like I'm happy for her, meanwhile wanting to beat this guy to the ground for "stealing my girl" all the while I have my own girlfriend(and others in past, even when i was working up the courage to ask). It's the worst thing I've ever done with my life(and I'm tempted to start my own thread about it at times).
That doesn't sound healthy. You might want to consider distancing yourself from your "friend", especially if you're not single. You owe your partner a little more than that.
Also, for Anubis: Listen to Highroller. If you go to class and work on staring at her (that's what you're doing, despite your attempt to romanticize "eye contact"), she's going to mark you as a creep and you can just forget about it.
That doesn't sound healthy. You might want to consider distancing yourself from your "friend", especially if you're not single. You owe your partner a little more than that.
My girlfriend is fine with me having a female best friend, I spend more time with the gf than I do with my best friend anyways, and they both are fine being around eachother. I don't fool around with my best friend, but we do goof around sometimes when my girlfriends not around. Nothing that constitutes cheating ofcourse, just wouldn't be appreciated I guess. I'm fine with it until the point where I finally break down. I mean, if it came to me losing my girlfriend or my best friend, I would stick with my friend. She's been there for me for a long time now(and I for her) and we're extremely close, current girlfriends about 3months in, I like her alot but I haven't really found myself in love with her. It's unfortunate.
My girlfriend is fine with me having a female best friend, I spend more time with the gf than I do with my best friend anyways, and they both are fine being around eachother. I don't fool around with my best friend, but we do goof around sometimes when my girlfriends not around. Nothing that constitutes cheating ofcourse, just wouldn't be appreciated I guess. I'm fine with it until the point where I finally break down. I mean, if it came to me losing my girlfriend or my best friend, I would stick with my friend. She's been there for me for a long time now(and I for her) and we're extremely close, current girlfriends about 3months in, I like her alot but I haven't really found myself in love with her. It's unfortunate.
I don't care how your girlfriend feels about it. The unhealthy part is how you feel about it. Especially with this illuminating revelation.
QFT'd. I'm still very much in love with my best friend(shes a girl). We became friends because I was trying to find a way to ask her out, and by the point I had I was firmly in the friend zone. Now we're like family but it's physically the most stressful and tiring experience you could ever imagine. She told me flat out it would never happen and if I had asked like a year before hand we would have gone out. Now I have to see her every other day usually with some other guy and fake like I'm happy for her, meanwhile wanting to beat this guy to the ground for "stealing my girl" all the while I have my own girlfriend(and others in past, even when i was working up the courage to ask). It's the worst thing I've ever done with my life(and I'm tempted to start my own thread about it at times).
Then stop doing it.
Seriously, tell her you're in love with her. Tell her you still are.
What is stopping you from doing this? Honestly, if you're in love with someone, why would you keep it secret from her? You know her well enough to tell her this.
You're in a relationship right now, but if you're not in love with her, and it's been three months, may I ask why you're still in it?
Because I believe in his original post he said that she said that it wasn't gonna happen. (God, that would be such a good rhyme somehow! I threw myself way deep into the rap thing.)
You might have meant that, but what you said was
so you can see where I got the idea. Anyways, what your problem amounts to is your self-image. You can get over it and talk to this girl, and laugh at your old self regardless of her reaction, or you can keep making excuses to avoid talking to her, blame your intimidation on her superpowers and hate yourself as you continue to repeat the pattern with other women. It has nothing to do with the girl; she could be any other chick and you'd be in the same situation. It's about your choice.
Eh, I suppose you do have a point there. I usually tend to have this problem with anyone I like, (and sometimes even just with women in general, whether I like them or not) I guess it stems from a fear that I will be seen by them as being annoying or creepy somehow.
WUBRGCommander Decklists - PaperWUBRG
CCCCCommander Decklists - TheorycraftCCCC
Sig Credit: Pegasus Bishop
Don't feel bad; it's very common. I went through it. But the sooner you realize you're the only one who cares about changing it (and the only one with the ability, besides), the better.
And?
WUBRGCommander Decklists - PaperWUBRG
CCCCCommander Decklists - TheorycraftCCCC
Sig Credit: Pegasus Bishop
Have you ever seen that movie with Adam Sandler and Drew Barrymore called 50 first dates? That is what's up. Try to pretend like your girl has memory loss, and she'll forget completely what happened the previous day.
That's how you've got to approach it. If you can trick your brain into believing it long enough then you'll be loose and confident when you approach her, you'll be "yourself", no fear because there's no consequences.
If I understand correctly, you
A) like this girl, but are afraid that she might know you like her if you talk to her, and
B) are worried that this girl--who is not your friend and who you don't really talk to--will feel awkward.
For a worst-case scenario, that seems pretty mild to me.
Also, why wouldn't you want her to know that you like her? So you can go on liking her behind her back, without fear of her approval or lack thereof, avoiding all consequences at the small expense of sacrificing any chance of a relationship you might have? Now that's creepy.
I want to have your babies.
Temporarily retired from the game
Thanks a bunch to Rivenor from Miraculous Recovery Signatures for the awesome sigpic!
Rage quit reason of the moment:
For example, there was this pretty girl in many of my classes. She was always with some guy (who later was revealed to be in the dreaded friend zone). Then one day, I saw that he wasn't there, so there was an empty spot next to her. I gathered all my courage, more or less "dropped" my all-present fear, and just went to sit next to her. Everything after that went perfectly smooth, and not long after she became my girl.
The lesson: thinking about it makes things harder and harder, you just have to do it.
Worst case scenario: you lose your dream. Best case scenario: you live your dream!
( 0.0 )
=O ((U/R)) O=
(")(")
I'm an AI making Magic cards.
http://www.staalmedia.nl/nexus/#generate
Despite my previous "suggestions", a simple, friendly chat is often the best. Sit next to her, smile and say hi. Let it continue from there.
Temporarily retired from the game
Thanks a bunch to Rivenor from Miraculous Recovery Signatures for the awesome sigpic!
Rage quit reason of the moment:
At our age they get stern and awkward talkings to about the birds and the beas and protection if they go out with anyone older... so, its often their first question
Temporarily retired from the game
Thanks a bunch to Rivenor from Miraculous Recovery Signatures for the awesome sigpic!
Rage quit reason of the moment:
Pathetic.
WUBRGCommander Decklists - PaperWUBRG
CCCCCommander Decklists - TheorycraftCCCC
Sig Credit: Pegasus Bishop
Just do it and even if you mess up it will help you in the future
http://quazen.com/games/card-games/how-i-followed-my-guts-and-got-an-invite-to-worlds-bolivian-nationals-report-2nd/
also featured at the Starkinton Post
http://www.thestarkingtonpost.com/articles/-/Bolivia_Nationals_2nd
Don't beat yourself up too much. If you're afraid of screwing it up with this girl, then take baby steps and chat up some other girls whom you haven't put on a pedestal. That'll give you some practice for the real thing.
WUBRGCommander Decklists - PaperWUBRG
CCCCCommander Decklists - TheorycraftCCCC
Sig Credit: Pegasus Bishop
"Don't be nervous, be AWESOME". Say it to yourself, close your eyes and and just talk to her (remember to open your eyes).
I do love the eye contact part of things though That's the funnest bit.
Temporarily retired from the game
Thanks a bunch to Rivenor from Miraculous Recovery Signatures for the awesome sigpic!
Rage quit reason of the moment:
No.
You stop thinking and jump in. You don't conquer fear and anxiety by listening to fear and anxiety, you conquer it by running at the thing that's scary.
Just go do it.
QFT'd. I'm still very much in love with my best friend(shes a girl). We became friends because I was trying to find a way to ask her out, and by the point I had I was firmly in the friend zone. Now we're like family but it's physically the most stressful and tiring experience you could ever imagine. She told me flat out it would never happen and if I had asked like a year before hand we would have gone out. Now I have to see her every other day usually with some other guy and fake like I'm happy for her, meanwhile wanting to beat this guy to the ground for "stealing my girl" all the while I have my own girlfriend(and others in past, even when i was working up the courage to ask). It's the worst thing I've ever done with my life(and I'm tempted to start my own thread about it at times).
Thanks to syndarion of Aeternal Studios for the awesome Sig.
Standard: MWLC All-InFect Illusion Control(MTGO)
EDH(MODO): :symg::symu::symb:The Mimeoplasm:symg::symu::symb: 6-2-0 in 4player
That doesn't sound healthy. You might want to consider distancing yourself from your "friend", especially if you're not single. You owe your partner a little more than that.
Also, for Anubis: Listen to Highroller. If you go to class and work on staring at her (that's what you're doing, despite your attempt to romanticize "eye contact"), she's going to mark you as a creep and you can just forget about it.
Oh, and I'm making a rap cover about this whole situation, lolz.
WUBRGCommander Decklists - PaperWUBRG
CCCCCommander Decklists - TheorycraftCCCC
Sig Credit: Pegasus Bishop
My girlfriend is fine with me having a female best friend, I spend more time with the gf than I do with my best friend anyways, and they both are fine being around eachother. I don't fool around with my best friend, but we do goof around sometimes when my girlfriends not around. Nothing that constitutes cheating ofcourse, just wouldn't be appreciated I guess. I'm fine with it until the point where I finally break down. I mean, if it came to me losing my girlfriend or my best friend, I would stick with my friend. She's been there for me for a long time now(and I for her) and we're extremely close, current girlfriends about 3months in, I like her alot but I haven't really found myself in love with her. It's unfortunate.
Thanks to syndarion of Aeternal Studios for the awesome Sig.
Standard: MWLC All-InFect Illusion Control(MTGO)
EDH(MODO): :symg::symu::symb:The Mimeoplasm:symg::symu::symb: 6-2-0 in 4player
I don't care how your girlfriend feels about it. The unhealthy part is how you feel about it. Especially with this illuminating revelation.
Then stop doing it.
Seriously, tell her you're in love with her. Tell her you still are.
What is stopping you from doing this? Honestly, if you're in love with someone, why would you keep it secret from her? You know her well enough to tell her this.
You're in a relationship right now, but if you're not in love with her, and it's been three months, may I ask why you're still in it?
WUBRGCommander Decklists - PaperWUBRG
CCCCCommander Decklists - TheorycraftCCCC
Sig Credit: Pegasus Bishop