Niche field? There are HOARDES of places that give x-rays and MRI's and CAT scans, if you don't know any, call you doctor and ask them for names and numbers I garauntee you the will have a list longer than your arm. It's the inverse of niche.
Niche field? There are HOARDES of places that give x-rays and MRI's and CAT scans, if you don't know any, call you doctor and ask them for names and numbers I garauntee you the will have a list longer than your arm. It's the inverse of niche.
Where do you live?
You're right, I didn't consider all the different places there are. That's another interesting factor.
I live in Pennsylvania.
Also, My g/f called me every swear word in the book for a few hours today and then told me she's going to get the law involved...for no reason. I literally just said talk to me about problems if you have any V_V.
You're right, I didn't consider all the different places there are. That's another interesting factor.
I live in Pennsylvania.
Also, My g/f called me every swear word in the book for a few hours today and then told me she's going to get the law involved...for no reason. I literally just said talk to me about problems if you have any V_V.
Sigh.
Yeah, well, you knew her better than we did and you decided to get her pregnant, so that's what yo uneed to deal with
Pennsylvania is a pretty big sttae, but if you are anywhere near Philly or a decnet subrb, there are medical imaging center everywhere.
But in most areas, nobody is hiring right now. Let's be frank, few people are hiring in any area.
But you have to aim for whatever the next area of big growth is gonna be, and hope to catch that wave as it comes. You have to work your ass off today to make some cash AND study something that will help you when that wave comes. Whether it's training to be a tech, a respiratory therapist, whatever... But study what seems most likely to get you a job in 2012 or 2013.
Unless you're already wealthy, you need to work really hard right now, and not goof around. You want to have fun, but between making money for yourself and your kid, educating yourself for the next stage of advancement, and spending time with your kid, there is not much time left to do anything other than sleep.
But if you don't take that approach, give up easily, can't delay gratification, you will never get out of the hole you're in.
Don't eat that marshmallow. I promise you'll have 2 in 20 minutes if you wait...
To become an ER Med Tech there are usually a few certifications that you need. EMTBasic, EKG and IV. Then you usually need a bit of time in the field, usually as an EMT. This is not a particularly quick route.
Yeah, but now she has offered me the out of "Signing away my rights as a parent"... I haven't really been able to find out how realistic this actually is but she said if I just sign a paper I'll only get to see the kid whenever she wants (which means never if she never wants me too) and I won't have to ever pay child support or anything else...
Is this a realistic option? I'm thinking about the quality of my life here, and if adding a child that I don't even know is mine (I now have to get a paternity test because she's saying it isn't) while I have a way to NOT add that aforementioned child, I think from a logical standpoint it's something to at least consider.
If there is a question, find out if the kid is yours. If it isn't and you can't get past that, it's better to not be around at all than to be there and make the child suffer for it. Also, make sure she breastfeeds the kid. It will be much healthier the longer it can go without formula. We were able to completely skip formula after over a year of breastfeeding and head right to cow's milk.
Isn't that sort of HER decision? How do you "make sure" she does that?
this is pretty much true, but at the same time I see nothing wrong with him strongly encouraging it. It is significantly healthier for the Baby than forumla is (assuming the mother is not engaging in dangerous activities like drug use / heavy drinking at the same time)
this is pretty much true, but at the same time I see nothing wrong with him strongly encouraging it. It is significantly healthier for the Baby than forumla is (assuming the mother is not engaging in dangerous activities like drug use / heavy drinking at the same time)
Oh trust me, if there was a way to get every baby breast fed that would be awesome, but there are these irritating thing that gets in the way called choice and/or biology. Both our boys were boobbabies until they were 12 months and I'm pretty sure it was 100% the right thing to do, but it was her choice and her choice alone. MTGS is pretty dude-oriented and a lot of the water cooler discussions end up being about telling others what to do and it seems like bad advice to tell a guy on here that his best course of action is to boss around an already unwilling (it sounds) partner.
The best and only advice I will offer up is to take care of your baby. If you and your girl do it together, even better!
There a alot of state/federal programs to help you out.
WIC will help you get food (Milk, peanut butter, bread, eggs, cereal, etc. Its alot of food every two weeks.)You will also get formula if your girls decides not to breast feed. As your baby gets older they will provide you with baby food as well. They will also give you nutritional advice for baby and momma and help you along the way as well.
also, the local food bank and food stamp programs. Dont shy away from Goodwill/Yardsales either =)
I have used all of this stuff and they have helped my family (married for 8 yrs w/ a 17 mos old son and a 4 yr old daughter) very much!!
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Oh trust me, if there was a way to get every baby breast fed that would be awesome, but there are these irritating thing that gets in the way called choice and/or biology. Both our boys were boobbabies until they were 12 months and I'm pretty sure it was 100% the right thing to do, but it was her choice and her choice alone. MTGS is pretty dude-oriented and a lot of the water cooler discussions end up being about telling others what to do and it seems like bad advice to tell a guy on here that his best course of action is to boss around an already unwilling (it sounds) partner.
Well, make sure might have been too much but it was meant with the best intentions. I feel strongly about giving your kids the best start to life possible and breastfeeding makes for healthier kids with stronger immune systems. If that means be a little bit pushy to get the girlfriend/wife to give the extra effort to stick with breastfeeding, so be it.
this is pretty much true, but at the same time I see nothing wrong with him strongly encouraging it. It is significantly healthier for the Baby than forumla is (assuming the mother is not engaging in dangerous activities like drug use / heavy drinking at the same time)
Don't be one of "those" people that feels the need to tell other people how to raise thier kids. Millions upon millions upon millions of babies are raised every year on formula and the world hasn't ended. Don't be another uninformed zealot, the world has enough of those. Formula is just fine.
Don't be one of "those" people that feels the need to tell other people how to raise thier kids. Millions upon millions upon millions of babies are raised every year on formula and the world hasn't ended. Don't be another uninformed zealot, the world has enough of those. Formula is just fine.
Formula is just fine. If there is an option to use either at the very start, though, which is superior? There is only one correct answer to that question, but if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.
Formula is just fine. If there is an option to use either at the very start, though, which is superior? There is only one correct answer to that question, but if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.
No there is not one correct answer to that quesiton, for all sorts of reasons people pointed out in this thread. You are not the authority on what is correct or incorrect for anyone elses child.
No there is not one correct answer to that quesiton, for all sorts of reasons people pointed out in this thread. You are not the authority on what is correct or incorrect for anyone elses child.
I was talking about what is better for a child nutritionally speaking. Breast milk is easily better for a baby in many ways. That isn't even in question. With no other factors in consideration, it is not even debatable.
Well since the mother wants nothing to do with me, me telling her to do anything would probably be bad for my health...
like I said though. filing a mutual TPR, realistic or not?
Also, I have a history of mental health disabilities, I think if I admit myself into a mental hospital I wouldn't have to pay her anything either?
Once again this is a really simple thing. She is trying to stick me with a kid that I don't even know is mine, and if a paternity test proves that it is mine, will make me pay so much child support that I will end up in prison because there is no way I can pay off my college debt AND give her 300$ a month (I make 240$ a month).
So obviously, a perfect way for me to not be stuck with her, would be to file a TPR, but I understand that those are only filed voluntarily under extreme circumstances (adoption), but apparently if it's mutual it goes through without a hitch really?
I mean, obviously with my mental health it wouldn't make sense for me to be stuck with multiple payments since the man that was essentially my father killed himself because of too much money accumlating, so with a history of suicide(s) in my family, I figure that the court wouldn't take literally all my paycheck.
Some of you may think I'm being callous, or unloving, but this is a VERY stressful situation, one which I would help none of you would go through, and I wouldn't wish on a single other human being on the face of the planet. Seriously.
What sort of a person admits themselves to a mental health facility to avoid paying money towards their child? There are people that could use the time and resources of said facility for actual self-progression.
What sort of a person admits themselves to a mental health facility to avoid paying money towards their child? There are people that could use the time and resources of said facility for actual self-progression.
See, you mistook my point completely.
I have a long, drawn out history of mental illness. I see a psychiatrist every 2 weeks. I take multiple anti-depressents/mood stabilizers/tranquilizers etc.
Admitting myself to a mental hospital IS SOMETHING I'VE ALREADY DONE.
I'm FAR from perfect, and I've had a VERY hard life up to this point, I have lived on the streets with no money or food or care from MY PARENTS for a specific amount of time, I have been arrested, I have been thrown in mental institutions against my will for the betterment of my psyche, and you think I want to go back there for ****s and giggles?
Maybe you don't know what the inside of a mental institution is like. Let me enlighten you, because I have stayed in numerous ones.
1. You are locked behind a 1-2 foot steel door.
2. You are surronded by DEEPLY disturbed people, even if you are only major depressed you are put into the same area as people who talk about killing others all day long. You can hear them if your door is opened.
3. Padded rooms are not jokes. You are put in one with a cot and a white sheet, perhaps a remote if you promise not to slit your wrists with the back of it to watch TV embedded in the wall behind a plate of unbreakable glass so you can't bang your head into it and kill yourself.
4. You are woken up every 2-3 hours to check your mental stability. How is your mental stability after getting 2-3 hours of sleep for days because a person in a lab-coat comes in with a clipboard and literally doesn't allow you to sleep until you answer all their questions?
Please. Do not ever lecture me on my choices in life. You don't know what I've been through at all, nor do I think you could IMAGINE what I've been through. I'm a diagnosed schizophrenic, do you know what that's like? Do you ever see things? Things you know aren't there, but scare you nonetheless?
I went through a period where I saw nothing but bugs for every bolt, nail, or anything such as that. I saw spiders embedded in nails. Hundreds of cockroaches writhing in the corner of a room. I have documented evidence by NUMEROUS therapists and psychiatrists that this is what happened, yet you have the audacity to tell me it's an excuse?
Mental instituions are HUNDREDS of times worse than prison. Prison you get a lone time, you get food, you get to workout, you get to socialize with other humans.
Mental institutions you are asked questions by people that obviously judge you (like how you are judging me), are given barely any edible food, and never EVER leave your room. EVER.
Please, PLEASE, if you want to try and say I'm in the wrong, click the back button because I don't have the time, or the mental stability to relive what I've been through to try and justify myself to random people on the internet.
Please, PLEASE, if you want to try and say I'm in the wrong, click the back button because I don't have the time, or the mental stability to relive what I've been through to try and justify myself to random people on the internet.
So what is this thread for? Justifying yourself is exactly the response I'd expect from someone making claims such as you are doing. How can I take you at your word? This is the internet, and you are just as random a person as I am. Given that this is your thread, and an obviously a controversial topic you started, how did you expect to get through it without answering uncomfortable questions and having to explain yourself?
So what is this thread for? Justifying yourself is exactly the response I'd expect from someone making claims such as you are doing. How can I take you at your word? This is the internet, and you are just as random a person as I am. Given that this is your thread, and an obviously a controversial topic you started, how did you expect to get through it without answering uncomfortable questions and having to explain yourself?
Controversial thread?
I'm simply asking if there's a way to not be taken for everything I have when my inane ex girlfriend will spend it on tattoo supplies and **** for her dog, and any other material items she wants. Do you even know how child support works? It's not like she has to PROVE that she is spending it on what I'm giving it to her for.
Child support is a corrupt system, because I'd gladly care for my child within the bounds of what I can. Making someone pay something they literally CANNOT pay doesn't seem right to me, and I don't understand how it seems right to you as well.
The cost of living for a child is around 300-400 dollars a month when added to my ex's income. Instead, I will likely be paying 500-600 dollars a month when I make 1/3rd of that at my current job.
and how can I justify myself? There is no public record of my mental illnesses, and my record has been expunged because I haven't done anything stupid since I turned 18, but I have spiraled down into depression. Then depression worsened to the point I was regularly trying to kill myself by taking X amount of advil/tylenol/over the counter sleeping pills/etc. etc. until I damaged my body to the point where I can never take ibuprofen again, and the sleeping pills I OD'd on ****ed my brain to the point where I can't tell what is real or what is not real when it's right infront of me.
Trust me, schizophrenia? Not exactly the bees knees to have. I can tell you what medicine I'm on, but then it'd be just as easy to say I got that from google or something.
There is no justification I can give you. I gave you an apt description of most mental health facilities, too bad you can't go and take a tour of one though, can you?
It's not so much as uncomfortable as it is mentally exhausting to relive parts of my past that shouldn't have happened in the first place. Being mentally exhausted usually makes me want to commit suicide, because suicide has been a valid option to me ever since I experienced the only role model I felt I ever needed in my family kill himself. Plus being diagnosed with major depression and mild schizophrenia USUALLY doesn't help with my self-image, or outlook on life you know?
This isn't a thread for people to become my therapists though. I'm asking a simple question. Is someone that has diagnosed mental illnesses still required to pay child support?
It's not like I'm trying to get out of paying it at all. I'm trying to pay what I can, I'd be more than willing to pay what I can. Some calculators show that I will pay 63$ a month (the PACES calculator showed that, or whatever PA child support website is called now).
That seems pretty manageable to me. 30$ garnished a paycheck, I'd be fine with that. Now, 300$ a month? when my ex makes QUADRUPLE I do? And I will get most likely to see my child once a year, if that? So time with my child = .05% out of the year. That makes it so I have to pay less as well.
Now if she pushes for sole custody, then I'll be completely ****ed because I'll have to pay INSANE amounts of money just because I couldn't get a lawyer good enough to get me joint custody.
Now, the fairness in this situation is...? I have no say in wheather (if the kid is mine) I want the kid or not. Adoption? Nope. Anything else? No say here.
So why wouldn't I terminate my parental rights? I'm obviously unfit to be a parent. I'm a depressed, schizophrenic, 19 year old with tons of debt. You want me raising another human being? I struggle to keep myself ALIVE every day, but now I have to worry about ANOTHER person?
I'm OBVIOUSLY not ready for this. It's not rocket science. Unstable mental health KID raising another KID=BAD.
I don't have a say in the child ANYWAY, so I mine as well terminate my rights NOW so I don't have to throw money at my ex who makes QUADRUPLE what I do and has NO problems other than she's been to JUV. Wow, big whoop, she's probably unfit to be a mother as well but she's all fine and dandy about it. Well, I'm not, but sadly "Father's Rights" in this country don't really extend far enough for me to DO anything about not being ready.
Hmm. I apologize for going on about breastfeeding when you obviously have much more troubling issues to work through. I hope you figure it out and wish you the best of luck with your decision.
I probably came off as a complete tool in my other post and I didn't mean too.
The thing is, I don't think I'm ready for a kid at all but I accept the consequences of what I did.
In the same regard, I don't think she should be allowed to get sole custody and make me pay insane child support so I can never see my kid. I'd gladly see my kid every week and buy them whatever they wanted if she would just let me help out, but no of course not. It's pretty depressing, and it makes me even more depressed knowing I have almost no say in what happens it seems and that I can't change whatever the outcome is except appealing the CS order, which I will most likely lose.
So I would be happy to pay child support if I would just get to see my kid, but since I won't get to see them more than MAYBE once a year, and during that year I'll have to be paying HER tons of money, not my kid, who knows what in gods name she'll use it on, I don't think I should be involved in a monetary way at all because I just see it hurting me. I'd gladly visit my child and give THEM money every week.
First, given all your issues, you may want to go get a vasectomy. You are obviously having unprotected sex and are one of the worst candidates for fatherhood I've ever seen, by your own admission.
you are doing the absolute right thing getting the paternity test. If it comes back and you are the father, you are going to get screwed b the family courts. It's just the unfortunate fact of the matter. They won;t order you to pay more child support than you make, you can't get blood from a stone, but you will be forced to pay some child suppoort, and they will garnish your wages and tax returns, and if you don't pay you will be arrested.
Is someone that has diagnosed mental illnesses still required to pay child support?
I don't think your state of mind has anthing to do with it. Despite your description of your condition, you are not on SSI, so you can work, and you can earn an income, and wil lbe expected to pay child support.
I don't think I should be involved in a monetary way at all because I just see it hurting me
A family court judge is going to laugh in your face if yo say that in court. If this goes to court, you need to talk to a lawyer. It will be LESS expensive than if you don't.
Niche field? There are HOARDES of places that give x-rays and MRI's and CAT scans, if you don't know any, call you doctor and ask them for names and numbers I garauntee you the will have a list longer than your arm. It's the inverse of niche.
Where do you live?
You're right, I didn't consider all the different places there are. That's another interesting factor.
I live in Pennsylvania.
Also, My g/f called me every swear word in the book for a few hours today and then told me she's going to get the law involved...for no reason. I literally just said talk to me about problems if you have any V_V.
Sigh.
Yeah, well, you knew her better than we did and you decided to get her pregnant, so that's what yo uneed to deal with
Pennsylvania is a pretty big sttae, but if you are anywhere near Philly or a decnet subrb, there are medical imaging center everywhere.
But in most areas, nobody is hiring right now. Let's be frank, few people are hiring in any area.
But you have to aim for whatever the next area of big growth is gonna be, and hope to catch that wave as it comes. You have to work your ass off today to make some cash AND study something that will help you when that wave comes. Whether it's training to be a tech, a respiratory therapist, whatever... But study what seems most likely to get you a job in 2012 or 2013.
Unless you're already wealthy, you need to work really hard right now, and not goof around. You want to have fun, but between making money for yourself and your kid, educating yourself for the next stage of advancement, and spending time with your kid, there is not much time left to do anything other than sleep.
But if you don't take that approach, give up easily, can't delay gratification, you will never get out of the hole you're in.
Don't eat that marshmallow. I promise you'll have 2 in 20 minutes if you wait...
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Stanford_marshmallow_experiment
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Deferred_gratification
http://forums.mtgsalvation.com/showthread.php?p=10498534#post10498534
Is this a realistic option? I'm thinking about the quality of my life here, and if adding a child that I don't even know is mine (I now have to get a paternity test because she's saying it isn't) while I have a way to NOT add that aforementioned child, I think from a logical standpoint it's something to at least consider.
Isn't that sort of HER decision? How do you "make sure" she does that?
WUBRGPauper Battle BoxWUBRG ... and why I am not a fan of Wayne Reynolds' Illustrations.
this is pretty much true, but at the same time I see nothing wrong with him strongly encouraging it. It is significantly healthier for the Baby than forumla is (assuming the mother is not engaging in dangerous activities like drug use / heavy drinking at the same time)
Oh trust me, if there was a way to get every baby breast fed that would be awesome, but there are these irritating thing that gets in the way called choice and/or biology. Both our boys were boobbabies until they were 12 months and I'm pretty sure it was 100% the right thing to do, but it was her choice and her choice alone. MTGS is pretty dude-oriented and a lot of the water cooler discussions end up being about telling others what to do and it seems like bad advice to tell a guy on here that his best course of action is to boss around an already unwilling (it sounds) partner.
WUBRGPauper Battle BoxWUBRG ... and why I am not a fan of Wayne Reynolds' Illustrations.
There a alot of state/federal programs to help you out.
WIC will help you get food (Milk, peanut butter, bread, eggs, cereal, etc. Its alot of food every two weeks.)You will also get formula if your girls decides not to breast feed. As your baby gets older they will provide you with baby food as well. They will also give you nutritional advice for baby and momma and help you along the way as well.
http://www.pawic.com/
CHIP will make sure that your child, if uninsured is covered for alot of medical related issue's/Dr. appointments/checkups.
http://www.chipcoverspakids.com/
also, the local food bank and food stamp programs. Dont shy away from Goodwill/Yardsales either =)
I have used all of this stuff and they have helped my family (married for 8 yrs w/ a 17 mos old son and a 4 yr old daughter) very much!!
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Well, make sure might have been too much but it was meant with the best intentions. I feel strongly about giving your kids the best start to life possible and breastfeeding makes for healthier kids with stronger immune systems. If that means be a little bit pushy to get the girlfriend/wife to give the extra effort to stick with breastfeeding, so be it.
Don't be one of "those" people that feels the need to tell other people how to raise thier kids. Millions upon millions upon millions of babies are raised every year on formula and the world hasn't ended. Don't be another uninformed zealot, the world has enough of those. Formula is just fine.
Formula is just fine. If there is an option to use either at the very start, though, which is superior? There is only one correct answer to that question, but if it doesn't work out, it doesn't work out.
No there is not one correct answer to that quesiton, for all sorts of reasons people pointed out in this thread. You are not the authority on what is correct or incorrect for anyone elses child.
I was talking about what is better for a child nutritionally speaking. Breast milk is easily better for a baby in many ways. That isn't even in question. With no other factors in consideration, it is not even debatable.
like I said though. filing a mutual TPR, realistic or not?
Also, I have a history of mental health disabilities, I think if I admit myself into a mental hospital I wouldn't have to pay her anything either?
Once again this is a really simple thing. She is trying to stick me with a kid that I don't even know is mine, and if a paternity test proves that it is mine, will make me pay so much child support that I will end up in prison because there is no way I can pay off my college debt AND give her 300$ a month (I make 240$ a month).
So obviously, a perfect way for me to not be stuck with her, would be to file a TPR, but I understand that those are only filed voluntarily under extreme circumstances (adoption), but apparently if it's mutual it goes through without a hitch really?
I mean, obviously with my mental health it wouldn't make sense for me to be stuck with multiple payments since the man that was essentially my father killed himself because of too much money accumlating, so with a history of suicide(s) in my family, I figure that the court wouldn't take literally all my paycheck.
Some of you may think I'm being callous, or unloving, but this is a VERY stressful situation, one which I would help none of you would go through, and I wouldn't wish on a single other human being on the face of the planet. Seriously.
See, you mistook my point completely.
I have a long, drawn out history of mental illness. I see a psychiatrist every 2 weeks. I take multiple anti-depressents/mood stabilizers/tranquilizers etc.
Admitting myself to a mental hospital IS SOMETHING I'VE ALREADY DONE.
I'm FAR from perfect, and I've had a VERY hard life up to this point, I have lived on the streets with no money or food or care from MY PARENTS for a specific amount of time, I have been arrested, I have been thrown in mental institutions against my will for the betterment of my psyche, and you think I want to go back there for ****s and giggles?
Maybe you don't know what the inside of a mental institution is like. Let me enlighten you, because I have stayed in numerous ones.
1. You are locked behind a 1-2 foot steel door.
2. You are surronded by DEEPLY disturbed people, even if you are only major depressed you are put into the same area as people who talk about killing others all day long. You can hear them if your door is opened.
3. Padded rooms are not jokes. You are put in one with a cot and a white sheet, perhaps a remote if you promise not to slit your wrists with the back of it to watch TV embedded in the wall behind a plate of unbreakable glass so you can't bang your head into it and kill yourself.
4. You are woken up every 2-3 hours to check your mental stability. How is your mental stability after getting 2-3 hours of sleep for days because a person in a lab-coat comes in with a clipboard and literally doesn't allow you to sleep until you answer all their questions?
Please. Do not ever lecture me on my choices in life. You don't know what I've been through at all, nor do I think you could IMAGINE what I've been through. I'm a diagnosed schizophrenic, do you know what that's like? Do you ever see things? Things you know aren't there, but scare you nonetheless?
I went through a period where I saw nothing but bugs for every bolt, nail, or anything such as that. I saw spiders embedded in nails. Hundreds of cockroaches writhing in the corner of a room. I have documented evidence by NUMEROUS therapists and psychiatrists that this is what happened, yet you have the audacity to tell me it's an excuse?
Mental instituions are HUNDREDS of times worse than prison. Prison you get a lone time, you get food, you get to workout, you get to socialize with other humans.
Mental institutions you are asked questions by people that obviously judge you (like how you are judging me), are given barely any edible food, and never EVER leave your room. EVER.
Please, PLEASE, if you want to try and say I'm in the wrong, click the back button because I don't have the time, or the mental stability to relive what I've been through to try and justify myself to random people on the internet.
So what is this thread for? Justifying yourself is exactly the response I'd expect from someone making claims such as you are doing. How can I take you at your word? This is the internet, and you are just as random a person as I am. Given that this is your thread, and an obviously a controversial topic you started, how did you expect to get through it without answering uncomfortable questions and having to explain yourself?
Controversial thread?
I'm simply asking if there's a way to not be taken for everything I have when my inane ex girlfriend will spend it on tattoo supplies and **** for her dog, and any other material items she wants. Do you even know how child support works? It's not like she has to PROVE that she is spending it on what I'm giving it to her for.
Child support is a corrupt system, because I'd gladly care for my child within the bounds of what I can. Making someone pay something they literally CANNOT pay doesn't seem right to me, and I don't understand how it seems right to you as well.
The cost of living for a child is around 300-400 dollars a month when added to my ex's income. Instead, I will likely be paying 500-600 dollars a month when I make 1/3rd of that at my current job.
and how can I justify myself? There is no public record of my mental illnesses, and my record has been expunged because I haven't done anything stupid since I turned 18, but I have spiraled down into depression. Then depression worsened to the point I was regularly trying to kill myself by taking X amount of advil/tylenol/over the counter sleeping pills/etc. etc. until I damaged my body to the point where I can never take ibuprofen again, and the sleeping pills I OD'd on ****ed my brain to the point where I can't tell what is real or what is not real when it's right infront of me.
Trust me, schizophrenia? Not exactly the bees knees to have. I can tell you what medicine I'm on, but then it'd be just as easy to say I got that from google or something.
There is no justification I can give you. I gave you an apt description of most mental health facilities, too bad you can't go and take a tour of one though, can you?
It's not so much as uncomfortable as it is mentally exhausting to relive parts of my past that shouldn't have happened in the first place. Being mentally exhausted usually makes me want to commit suicide, because suicide has been a valid option to me ever since I experienced the only role model I felt I ever needed in my family kill himself. Plus being diagnosed with major depression and mild schizophrenia USUALLY doesn't help with my self-image, or outlook on life you know?
This isn't a thread for people to become my therapists though. I'm asking a simple question. Is someone that has diagnosed mental illnesses still required to pay child support?
It's not like I'm trying to get out of paying it at all. I'm trying to pay what I can, I'd be more than willing to pay what I can. Some calculators show that I will pay 63$ a month (the PACES calculator showed that, or whatever PA child support website is called now).
That seems pretty manageable to me. 30$ garnished a paycheck, I'd be fine with that. Now, 300$ a month? when my ex makes QUADRUPLE I do? And I will get most likely to see my child once a year, if that? So time with my child = .05% out of the year. That makes it so I have to pay less as well.
Now if she pushes for sole custody, then I'll be completely ****ed because I'll have to pay INSANE amounts of money just because I couldn't get a lawyer good enough to get me joint custody.
Now, the fairness in this situation is...? I have no say in wheather (if the kid is mine) I want the kid or not. Adoption? Nope. Anything else? No say here.
So why wouldn't I terminate my parental rights? I'm obviously unfit to be a parent. I'm a depressed, schizophrenic, 19 year old with tons of debt. You want me raising another human being? I struggle to keep myself ALIVE every day, but now I have to worry about ANOTHER person?
I'm OBVIOUSLY not ready for this. It's not rocket science. Unstable mental health KID raising another KID=BAD.
I don't have a say in the child ANYWAY, so I mine as well terminate my rights NOW so I don't have to throw money at my ex who makes QUADRUPLE what I do and has NO problems other than she's been to JUV. Wow, big whoop, she's probably unfit to be a mother as well but she's all fine and dandy about it. Well, I'm not, but sadly "Father's Rights" in this country don't really extend far enough for me to DO anything about not being ready.
The thing is, I don't think I'm ready for a kid at all but I accept the consequences of what I did.
In the same regard, I don't think she should be allowed to get sole custody and make me pay insane child support so I can never see my kid. I'd gladly see my kid every week and buy them whatever they wanted if she would just let me help out, but no of course not. It's pretty depressing, and it makes me even more depressed knowing I have almost no say in what happens it seems and that I can't change whatever the outcome is except appealing the CS order, which I will most likely lose.
So I would be happy to pay child support if I would just get to see my kid, but since I won't get to see them more than MAYBE once a year, and during that year I'll have to be paying HER tons of money, not my kid, who knows what in gods name she'll use it on, I don't think I should be involved in a monetary way at all because I just see it hurting me. I'd gladly visit my child and give THEM money every week.
you are doing the absolute right thing getting the paternity test. If it comes back and you are the father, you are going to get screwed b the family courts. It's just the unfortunate fact of the matter. They won;t order you to pay more child support than you make, you can't get blood from a stone, but you will be forced to pay some child suppoort, and they will garnish your wages and tax returns, and if you don't pay you will be arrested.
I don't think your state of mind has anthing to do with it. Despite your description of your condition, you are not on SSI, so you can work, and you can earn an income, and wil lbe expected to pay child support.
A family court judge is going to laugh in your face if yo say that in court. If this goes to court, you need to talk to a lawyer. It will be LESS expensive than if you don't.