Oompa Noomp
Creature - Weird
Oompa Noomp is every color
As an additional cost to play Oompa Noomp, reveal a Weird card from your hand. Add one mana of any color to your mana pool.
You can have any amount of Oompa Noomps in your deck.
0/1
Next: Crucible of Fire9
Tribal Artifact - Dragon
:symtap:: Return Crucible of Fire to its owner's hand.
Essence ShiftRUU
Instant (R)
If target spell would be countered, instead search your library for a copy of that card and play it without paying its mana cost.
Shadow Sneak :symu::symu:
Sorcery
Target creature you control is unblockable and gains "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, return target permanent he or she controls to its owner's hand" until end of turn.
Next: Scarblade4
Tribal Artifact - Elf Equipment
Equipped creature gains +1/+0 and deathtouch. If equipped creature is an elf, it gains deathtouch.
Equip 4
tumultuous: My avatar pings any card anywhere, its unreasonable and nuts, but one of the things to do with it is ping the opponents hand, and the card gets "destroyed" at the end of the turn, that's how the card works.
That's your problem, though. You can't invent rules that don't exist in Magic and don't appear on the card. Revisit this section of the rules before I continue:
It might be good to review the un- cards that have been printed so far by Wizards. Note that they are all designed so that they actually work still. The fun of them (and the reason they aren't allowed in tournaments) is that they often utilize a part of the game that can't usually be explored (like players' clothing). They are not sets of dumb cards that are just broken. In many ways this will be a far more challenging CCL because you still have to make cards that make sense and function. These sets are generally about letting the designers design with more freedom and allowing the creative people fill in the humor.
Your avatar does not say that it can target a player's hand. So how can it? Even if it did say that, who decides what card gets destroyed? Is it random? Do you see the problem here? All your avatar says is that it targets a noncreature card. That implies that the targeted card needs to be in a zone that things can be targeted. If you wanted it to be able to "zap" cards out of players' hands, you need to have said that. Just because these are un-cards, doesn't mean they can just do whatever they want without stating that they can do it. Does that make sense?
Animal Cruelty B
Instant (U)
Destroy target creature. It can't be regenerated.
Any player may mark your skin or clothing with red ink. If he or she does, discard two cards and lose 5 life. "Fish are people, too. Blood for blood!" - P.E.T.A. member
Scrutinization 1UU
Enchantment (R)
Cumulative upkeep - Draw a card.
When ~ leaves play, skip your next X turns, where X is the number of age counters on ~.
Well it kills your avatar. Check. What the hell is explansioning? I like how you tried to make it super-indestructible; without those characteristics, I'd say it's likely to be abused, but you've addressed that nicely, and with a clever un-twist. You've got a little wording awkwardness and a few grammatical errors. "May choose a card...put those cards into play." You've also got a pretty bad comma splice: "Each player may choose a card with converted mana cost X thats removed from the game, put those cards into play." Finally, "thats" is missing an apostrophe. None of those are a deal-breaker, but they should be considered and addressed. Overall, I like your card and you successfully meet all the criteria. Good job.
Ok I like the red with anger part - funny stuff. The problem I have with this card, is that it is supposed to destroy your avatar, but it won't destroy it unless your avatar pings it. Why would it ping it??? The card does nothing (in fact it is completely uncastable because it has no mana cost and no other way of playing it) UNLESS it is damaged. Why damage it? Does your avatar want to die? I just don't get it. I like your flavor text, but I feel like it has no real connection with the card or the avatar. I feel like I'm missing something here... or something. If I'm just being stupid, let me know. It doesn't work at all because you can't cast it, thus it cannot be damaged. It must be on the stack in order to be targeted, and there is no way to put it on the stack.
DQ
I'll be honest with you. It's extremely hard to muddle through your poorly written cards. The wording is just terrible. Let's get down to it, though. I'm assuming your avatar is supposed to say that it removes all other creatures from the game when it comes into play. Your counter doesn't work the way you have it written, but I'll overlook that and critique it as if it did work how you wanted it to. I'm guessing you wanted it to be able to flat out counter the avatar, so if it did, I suppose it would be a pretty good foil. Free counterspell? With no downside? I'm in. Well I guess hugging a fellow magic player can be a pretty steep cost. The second ability just doesn't make sense. How does a sorcery come into play? Assuming that was fixed, this is sort of like an Overrun I guess, but without the trample. It could give more than 3, I suppose, but I think it's pretty rare for there to be that many people "next to you," especially when you're playing un-magic
I absolutely love your avatar, and I really want to love your artifact, but it doesn't do anything! How do you put cards under it??? Un-magic isn't just a chaotic mess where you can do whatever you want (unless the cards dictate that). There is no text that allows cards to be put under Detention Class, thus, cards can't be put under it. Too bad, because I think you really had something there. I love the total protection part. I really, really wish you just had one more line of text - even something as simple as 1: Put target child underneath ~. Oh well - good effort, anyway.
No Show
Great idea with the artifact, though I don't think the execution was quite there. The aim to a player part is funnyish I guess, but mainly just a bit confusing. I also thought it was weird that you called the player an "it." Who... or what are you playing against? So the first ability essentially forces a player to change what they did in some way, right? I think that's a really cool and flavorful idea, but I could see problems. How much do they have to change? Let's say I was attacking and you want me to rethink that play and play in a different way. Ok. I'm still going to attack but I'm going to tap the creature to the left instead of the right. See where I'm going here? The middle ability seems like it does nothing. I guess your intention is to be able to change your avatar's toughness to a 0? The avatar ability (switching digits) isn't really "math" though.... I like the idea, but again, the wording could've been more precise I think. The final ability is awesome and I really like it, but 12 freaking mana? Seriously?? You ruined it!! Could've been so awesome, but 12 is just a stupidly high amount.
Let's start with the good stuff: I love the flavor for both your avatar and your destroyer. The card names and flavor text are awesome. Excellent job there. As for balance... well... are you high? These cards are terrible. I'm trying to figure out what that point of them is. So you play this extremely overcosted avatar with two terrible, terrible disadvantages? Huh? Then... Nanny Cam does what? So you play this ridicuously bad avatar and fortunately you have more life so you get to keep it! Yay! Now, when you attack, though, you have to worry about it getting stolen. Nanny Cam to the rescue! With this overcosted, semi-useless artifact, you can keep your crappy 5/7 forever! That baby is clean, and ready to fight for you forever, all for the low, low total cost of 15 and two cards. Just.. wow. So bad. Again, I love the flavor, but for cards this horribly, horribly bad, I can't possibly overlook that.
Lightning Strike:
http://forums.mtgsalvation.com/showthread.php?t=535389
Creature - Weird
Oompa Noomp is every color
As an additional cost to play Oompa Noomp, reveal a Weird card from your hand.
You can have any amount of Oompa Noomps in your deck.
0/1
Next:
Crucible of Fire 9
Tribal Artifact - Dragon
:symtap:: Return Crucible of Fire to its owner's hand.
1. _IF_
2. KoolKoal
3. MagicProfessor28
Instant (R)
If target spell would be countered, instead search your library for a copy of that card and play it without paying its mana cost.
Sorcery
Target creature you control is unblockable and gains "Whenever this creature deals combat damage to a player, return target permanent he or she controls to its owner's hand" until end of turn.
Next:
Scarblade 4
Tribal Artifact - Elf Equipment
Equipped creature gains +1/+0 and deathtouch. If equipped creature is an elf, it gains deathtouch.
Equip 4
Legendary Creature - Faerie Spirit
Flying, lifelink, haste
3/1
Sorcery (U)
Draw a card. Remove Brilliant Achievement from the game with three time counters on it.
Suspend 3 - U
That's your problem, though. You can't invent rules that don't exist in Magic and don't appear on the card. Revisit this section of the rules before I continue:
Your avatar does not say that it can target a player's hand. So how can it? Even if it did say that, who decides what card gets destroyed? Is it random? Do you see the problem here? All your avatar says is that it targets a noncreature card. That implies that the targeted card needs to be in a zone that things can be targeted. If you wanted it to be able to "zap" cards out of players' hands, you need to have said that. Just because these are un-cards, doesn't mean they can just do whatever they want without stating that they can do it. Does that make sense?
Instant (U)
Destroy target creature. It can't be regenerated.
Any player may mark your skin or clothing with red ink. If he or she does, discard two cards and lose 5 life.
"Fish are people, too. Blood for blood!" - P.E.T.A. member
Enchantment (R)
Cumulative upkeep - Draw a card.
When ~ leaves play, skip your next X turns, where X is the number of age counters on ~.
Instant
He feasts upon the very essence of time itself.
2. Solesticio
3. Homee1212
Subjective Points:
PlanesJaywalker: 2