<p>When I first became a parent at the young age of 21 I had no idea how I would impart this trust, information, and what little wisdom I thought I had. Would I sit down like some sit-com dad and tell him the facts of life and that he could always come to me for any reason and all would be well. That sounded absurd even to my young mind, so I worried a lot about how I could be the father that I wanted to be. I am now the father of a 19 year old young man, and I have learned that you can try to guide your kids to choices that you feel are wiser than the choices you made, but ultimately they have to have their own experiences. They will make mistakes and they will do stupid things, no matter what you teach them and no matter how you restrict them, and there is little you can do about it. The parental role is to give them all the information and provide reasonable restrictions, and to teach them not to fear telling you something that they have done that is against your wishes. That honesty is the hardest part, and only comes if they do not fear your wrath and your punishments make sense, otherwise they will hide all the important things from you out of fear and shame and when it all comes to a head you will have a disaster that will have far reaching consequences. All of this I largely learned and imparted by sharing my interests in gaming with him.</p>
<p>When it comes to gaming, I never once sought to make my child in to a gamer, but he saw me having fun and wanted to be a part of it. To be honest, he was the one that brought me back in to gaming. I had put aside my RPG books long ago, mostly due to the fact that my core group of Gamers had all dispersed after high school, and I got married and had a kid when I was 20 (all planned). I was far too busy learning to be a father in the early years to even think about trying to find new people to game with, and after a while it just felt like too much effort.</p>
<p>In that time I had been exposed to Magic several times. The first was by way of my brother-in-law in 1994- he had caught the bug and had tried to get me to play with him, but while I had heard talk of the game I had blown it off as a fad and a money sink. Then my wife and I went on vacation with he Mom and Brother to the San Juan islands, and on the ferry ride over I relented and let her Brother teach me Magic. It was pretty fun, but to be honest my mind was not 100% in the game and it was only the fervor of this kid (I think he was 15 at the time) that kept me playing for the whole vacation. I did not fully understand the game, and shortly after the trip my wife gave birth to R and everything became about him.</p>
<p>The coming years brought more exposure to the game by way of one of my old gaming friends- A had started collecting in college and taught me to play again a few time, but still it did not stick. Then Pokemon happened. On his own my son had caught the Pokemon bug playing with his friends at about age 5 or 6. R wanted me to play with him, so I let him teach me the game using his cards. It was pretty fun for me, and I loved having something I could do with him on his terms. I bought some cards for myself, though more for him, and soon I had a small collection and was making decks myself. While that was going on my buddy, A, had finally gotten magic to stick with me and I started very casually picking up a precon here and there in 2001. I still was not playing any card game seriously, but I was playing a lot more Pokemon with R than I was Magic.</p>
<p>R eventually heard about a new game, he was about seven or eight at the time, that was called Yu-Gi-Oh. He had exposed me to the Anime first, and even though I was a long time Anime fan I could not stand the screaming and goofy posturing of Yu-Gi-Oh. I actually used to like watching Pokemon with R when he was younger, but this new Anime was not for me. By the time R got in to playing the card game, I had pretty much gotten hooked on Magic. I was playing when I could, and casually collecting, but still I did not really try to teach R Magic. He was a very slow starter when it came to learning to read, and while he had memorized all his Yu-gi-oh cards, he still had a lot of trouble with the finer points of new cards. I played a little Yu-gi-oh with him, but never really liked anything about the game (aside from face down trap cards) so I never bought my own cards and only played the game when he really wanted me to.</p>
<p>In 2003 R started to get interested in Magic. His reading had improved and he liked the look of the cards, and was frequently asking me what they did or said. I offered to teach him, but I think the reading aspect made him anxious about it until it became clear the this was a reading exercise he could do with me that was a lot more fun than reading some Goosebumps book. I started by teaching the him the mana system- what mana was as opposed to lands, and this was not as hard as I thought thanks to his experience with Pokemon. He still sometimes reverted to Pokemon rules, but picked it up pretty quickly. Then I made some simple creature decks, as basic creature combat was simple and familiar from other games, and we played a few games with just that.</p>
<p>After he had that down I added in creature pump, land search, and card draw to the decks and we played a few games. He was picking things up pretty quickly, all things considered, but he was young and it took a little time. Finally I added in things like counters, burn, and removal to further understand the stack, and after a few games he was good to go. His reading trouble kept him from experiencing a wide range of cards, as he kept to the ones he knew well, but by the end of that school year his reading skill had increased significantly, and by the start of the next school year (ie over the summer) he was reading at grade level, and that would never had happened if it had not been for Magic and the Pokemon gameboy games. In that time he was not thinking about practicing reading, instead he was just playing in a reading rich environment and he picked it up. After that all the other TCGs went by the wayside. R was playing Magic with me and my adult friends, and eventually his cousin, G, and his friends. G's parents (my Aunt and Uncle) saw how much fun I had playing with G and R, and saw the benefits it had on our relationship, so they asked to be taught the game too. It was pretty great as the five of us had a great time playing taunting each other (all with humor and fun) and it further strengthened family bonds.</p>
<p>In the years to follow I taught many of R's friends to play Magic, and still play with them when I can. As a result I know all of his friends, and they are comfortable around me enough for me to really get to know them. I have way more social contact with R than I would if we had no activities in common, and I have proven to him that I really mean it when I tell him he can tell me anything and I will not get angry*. He is still a 19 year old guy who lives on his own, and there is plenty that he does not share with his old man, but when the rubber meets the road and stuff goes wrong between us we know there is safe neutral ground in the cards that will lead to reconciliation and more talking. It is an unbelievable test of my willpower and resolve to raise R into a good, thoughtful, responsible, and contributing member of society and I cannot even imagine doing that without Magic: the Gathering. We have played RPGs with his friends, and mine, and we play video games together as well, but Magic has been the constant thread that has held us together in rough seas and calm.</p>
<p>After much of his life spent gaming, R is not fat, he is not inactive, and he is not bitter about past mistakes. He has had a couple of stupid trades, but to be honest all of them were because he placed a great value on the card he wanted regardless of the monetary value. Sure, from a monetary perspective he got "screwed" in the trade, but he never cares because he wanted the card in question and ends up having a lot of fun playing it. He does not feel victimized by trade sharks, and looks back at all of it as a positive learning experience. I think that by not allowing your kids to have the independence to do what they want with their possessions you are cheating them out of experiences that shape them as they mature. When R came home when he was younger an told me about this awesome trade he made to get some almost unplayable fattie by trading off his Umezawa's Jitte I was so angry. It was a trade with someone older at the shop that was frequently there, so I could have gone back and menaced the asshat in to at least not doing it again, if not even reversing the trade, but I did not. Not out of some lack of will, because some hulk-esque rage bubbles up from inside when I hear that someone has done something to one of my kids. No, I held back my murderous urges for two reasons: 1) I respected his right make his own mistakes (within reason) and learn from them, and 2) He was stoked about the trade. He had a ton of fun trying to make a deck that would make the best use out of the fatty, had even more fun playing the deck as many times as necessarily to get the fatty out, and was fracken elated when it finally happened and he won by getting me down to something like -21 life. I never saw him have that much fun with Jitte, and frankly he never even cared to use it to it's full potential, but with the new card he was **** of the walk. I told him that the guy had gotten the card that was worth the most money, and that he had kinda taken advantage of him, but he was undeterred and did not care.</p>
<p>Eventually (and sooner than you think) your kids will be out in the world making important decisions for themselves and if they do not have the wisdom that can be taught only by experience then they will just get victimized worse. By sheltering young people you are not keeping them from being taken advantage of, you are just putting it off till a point in life where the stakes are higher. After all, would you rather your kid get cheated out of Sword of Feast and Famine now, or they get cheated out of their savings later on in life. It is a lesson that has to be learned by experience, and cannot be learned by way of talking or teaching. *I am not at all perfect in this regard, but I try very hard.</p>
- Jun 4, 2012 published the article Posted in: The Magic Between Us: it's all in the cards.
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Jun 3, 2012
published the article
Grave GivethMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 29
4 Birds of Paradise
3 Boneyard Worm
3 Fauna Shaman
3 Ghoultree
4 Hedron Crab
2 Magus of the Bazaar
4 Splinterfright
3 Street Wraith
3 Kira, Great Glass-Spinner
Non-Creature Spells 8
2 Forbidden Alchemy
3 Faithless Looting
3 PyroclasmLand 23
3 Misty Rainforest
3 Scalding Tarn
1 Svogthos, the Restless Tomb
2 Verdant Catacombs
1 Steam Vents
2 Watery Grave
2 Sacred Foundry
1 Overgrown Tomb
4 Forest
2 Island
2 MountainSideboard 15
3 Ancient Grudge
4 Ghost Quarter
2 Gnaw to the Bone
4 Rune Snag
2 Skaab Ruinator -
Jun 3, 2012
published the article
GUB InfectMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 18
4 Blighted Agent
4 Glistener Elf
4 Plague Stinger
3 Ichorclaw Myr
3 Noble Hierarch
Non-Creature Spells 20
3 Apostle's Blessing
3 Dismember
2 Groundswell
4 Might of Old Krosa
4 Mutagenic Growth
4 RemandLand 22
2 Ghost Quarter
4 Inkmoth Nexus
3 Misty Rainforest
2 Verdant Catacombs
1 Temple Garden
3 Watery Grave
1 Overgrown Tomb
4 Forest
2 IslandSideboard 15
1 Dismember
4 Dispel
3 Grafdigger's Cage
3 Maelstrom Pulse
4 Phyrexian Revoker -
May 30, 2012
published the article
SuppressorMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 12
3 Ethersworn Canonist
4 Loxodon Gatekeeper
1 Magus of the Moon
3 Sun Titan
1 Yosei, the Morning Star
Other Spells 25
2 Boom // Bust
2 Blood Moon
4 Ghostly Prison
4 Leyline of the Sanctity
4 Suppression Feild
3 Lightning Helix
4 Path to Exile
2 Shining ShoalLand 23
3 Mountain
5 Plains
4 Clifftop Retreat
4 Ghost Quarter
4 Sacred Foundry
3 Flagstones of TrokairSideboard 15
4 Oblivion Ring
4 Pyroclasm
4 Relic of Progenitus
3 Sowing Salt -
May 30, 2012
published the article
Walking DeadMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 23
4 Death Baron
4 Gravecrawler
2 Cemetery Reaper
2 Geralf's Messenger
4 Reassembling Skeleton
3 Fleshbag Marauder
4 Korlash, Heir to BlackbladeOther Spells
4 Bone Splinters
2 Liliana of the Veil
4 Countersquall
4 Mask of Memory
Land 23
14 Swamp
2 Bojuka Bog
4 Marsh Flats
3 Watery GraveSideboard 15
4 Go for the Throat
3 Hurkyl's Recall
4 Inquisition of Kozilek
4 Withered Wretch -
May 30, 2012
published the article
SkiesMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 15
2 Meloku the Clouded Mirror
2 Vendilion Clique
2 Anglel of Jubilation
3 Emeria Angel
3 Puresteel Paladin
3 Ornithopter
Equipment 11
3 Basilisk Collar
2 Cranial Plating
2 Mask of Memory
3 Moonsilver Spear
1 Sword of Fire and IceOther Spells 11
4 Path to Exile
3 Steelshaper's Gift
4 Favorable Winds
Land 23
2 Celestial Colonnade
2 Glacial Fortress
3 Marsh Flats
3 Scalding Tarn
2 Watery Grave
1 Godless Shrine
4 Island
6 PlainsSideboard 15
3 Ethersworn Canonist
3 Ghost Quarter
3 Hurkyl's Recall
4 Relic of Progenitus
3 Shining Shoal
2 Spellskite -
May 30, 2012
published the article
AnathamanticsMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 14
4 Anathamancer
4 Hypnotic Specter
3 Bloodghast
3 Dark Confidant
Other Spells 22
4 Lightning Bolt
4 Terminate
3 Extirpate
2 Liliana of the Veil
3 Damnation
4 Inquisition of Kozilek
2 Sowing SaltLand 24
2 Bojuka Bog
4 Dragonskull Summit
2 Graven Cairns
2 Urborg, Tomb of Yawgmoth
6 Mountain
8 SwampSideboard 15
4 Banefire
2 Liliana of the Veil
1 Extirpate
4 Leyline of the Void
3 Phyrexian Revoker
3 Ratchet Bomb -
May 30, 2012
published the article
Death & TaxesMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 26
4 Blade Splicer
4 Flickerwisp
4 Leonin Arbiter
4 Student of Warfare
2 Kitchen Finks
3 Jotun Grunt
2 Aven Mindcensor
3 Thalia, Guardian of ThrabenOther Spells 11
4 Aether Vial
4 Path to Exile
3 Mask of Memory
Land 23
4 Ghost Quarter
4 Horizon Canopy
4 Sunpetal Grove
2 Tectonic Edge
1 Temple Garden
8 PlainsSideboard 15
3 Gaddock Teeg
4 Ghostly Prison
4 Pithing Needle
4 Qasali Pridemage -
May 29, 2012
published the article
TNBTMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures 22
4 Dripping-Tongue Zubera
4 Ember-Fist Zubera
4 Ashen-Skin Zubera
4 Birds of Paradise
4 Thorn-Thrash Vaishino
2 Skullmulcher
Other Spells 14
4 Aether Vial
3 Path to Exile
4 Lingering Souls
3 Devouring GreedLand 24
4 Verdant Catacomb
2 Marsh Flats
2 Arid Mesa
1 Temple Garden
1 Sacred Foundry
1 Overgrown Tomb
1 Godless Shrine
2 Mountain
2 Swamp
2 Plains
6 ForestSideboard 15
4 Second Sunrise
3 Grafdigger's Cage
4 Relic of Progenitus
4 Mask of Memories -
Mar 6, 2012
published the article
Uber Scepter ControlMagic OnlineOCTGN2ApprenticeBuy These Cards Creatures:
3 Dark Confidant
4 Delver of Secrets
3 Snapcaster Mage
Artifacts:
4 Isochron Scepter
Instants:
4 Muddle the Mixture
3 Extirpate
2 Magma Jet
3 Funeral Charm
1 Terminate
1 Lightning Helix
3 Lightning Bolt
4 Spell SnareOthers:
2 Serum Visions
Land:
4 Scalding Tarn
3 Watery Grave
2 Halimar Depths
2 Academy Ruins
2 Marsh Flats
2 Buried Ruin
2 Creeping Tar Pit
1 Steam Vents
3 Island
1 Mountain
1 SwampSideboard:
4 Trickbind
2 Countersquall
1 Boomerang
1 Echoing Truth
1 Early Frost
4 Relic of Progenitus
2 Vendilion Clique -
Jan 19, 2012
published the article I have some venting I need to do.Posted in: My Shameful Love Affair
I have developed a dysfunctional love affair. It is one I have been tempted by for a long time, and one that I have tasted a few times, but up till now I have kept myself relatively clear of it. This affair is not unique, by any means, in fact it is one that many players blindly embrace with little to no thought of the damage it might cause.
Who is the temptress that drags me down? Margret Thatcher! Oh, and also all of my Modern decks.
I have always thought that deck construction and tuning were the most entertaining part of this game. I love playing, don't get me wrong, but I am obsessed with deck construction. If I see a deck idea that I like I feel compelled to put my stamp on it. It is even worse if it is a deck I thought up and developed on my own, because now there is pride involved. I have 17 EDH decks build (paper) and numerous decks online. Many players love their decks, but the relationship is one of camaraderie and shared responsibility- you construct and care for your deck well, and your deck is willing to go to war for you whenever you want and against any foe you choose.
My relationship with my decks is much less functional. It is one where in I take on the role of caregiver, sometimes smotheringly so, and protector, and the decks happily accept it. When most of you build a deck you are eager to play it regardless of the outcome of the game. You know, and rightly so, that the deck is meant to be used and abused, and only with repeated play against a mix of foes can you evolve your deck to it's ideal. For me, however, it is so frustrating and disheartening to see one of my loves get abused and beaten that I fail to put them to any significant test. I cannot stand the possibility that one of my loves might not be the magnificent gem that I think it is, so I sit staring at the screen as others exercise their decks, while mine sit and get puffed up with their own importance. They rarely face defeat because I rarely make them face anything for fear of that defeat.
I know that my creations need to be exercised and put to the test to know if they are great, but they are already great in my eyes, so there is nowhere to go but down. My colorful and creative Cuban Prison deck is too precious, and my athletic and immature Token deck is no less so. They are all under my protection, and that protection is killing them.
I will go so far as to click on the "new game" button, and fill in my preferences, but always find some excuse to hold off clicking the okay button. I will see a Modern game starting up by players I have watched before and will watch that instead, or will tell myself that I should not start a game (let alone a match) for fear that I may be called away from the computer or want to watch a talkie on the television. I know that these are excuses, but as the night goes on they become easier and easier until I am making them with little thought.
Oddly enough this is a purely MTGO for me. I have no compunction to protect my decks in meat-world- I have been known to willingly play deck after deck, and game after game against a degenerative Survival of the Fittest deck just to find that combination that will take the bastard down. When it comes to the virtually soulless world of MTGO, however, I feel hesitation born out of fear of failure. I have some suspicions about why this is- most rooted in the lack of true social interaction online, but have no clear understanding.
I really need to toss the decks in the arena of combat if I am going to call them great or defend their composition, but I am unsure how to make this change. I am an imaginative and optimistic person and I do not like my illusions shattered, but if I am to defend my creations I need to find a way to get past this. -
Jan 19, 2012
published the article I notice that there are certain threads the come up fairly often, on M:tG forums, and I get tired of typing them up over and over. If I Blog them here, however, I can link to them or just copy and paste them to the forum. I really do not have many epic plays, but the few I have I recall with great fondness.Posted in: Glory and Laziness
______________________________
Awesome Play #1:
One night I was playing EDH with my son. He was playing a 5C Progenitals deck for the first time, and I was playing a Shirei deck that I had only piloted once before. It is about turn 5 or 6 and I have just managed get enough mana to get Shirei in to play and equip it with Whispersilk Cloak. My son has been hitting all of his land drops and is making positive comments about what he has in hand. He has a Birds of Paradise in play and a Fauna Shaman, and has played a couple of instants and sorceries.
On his draw he gets a big smile and say something like "you are going to hate me for this", and I tell him to bring it on and not to hold back no matter how mean he thinks it is. He taps his lands and drops a Traumatize; I look at my giant deck and groan, thinking to myself that all my tools are about to disappear in to my graveyard and it will be very laborious to get it all back.
Then I look back at my hand and smile, my son apologizes, and I say, "don't worry, I think I can recover". Now, for those of you not familiar with this style of deck, it is filled with an inordinate amount of creatures with one power or less that sac for some useful ability, or give boons when they leave or come in to play; and now a vast number are in my graveyard now. He passes his turn, I get my land drop, tap my lands and play Living Death. My son looks at his graveyard and his heart drops as there are no creatures in it, I pick up my giant graveyard and proceed to bring back 18 creatures, some of which have "comes in to play" abilities.
After that the game went down hill for my boy. I played Dread Return on my next turn bringing back my Shirei that I allowed to go to my graveyard, and then began saccing my creatures to my heart's content. Between making him discard at least once a turn, me keeping him from drawing goodies with Nosepicker Witch, and him having to sac any creatures he did get in to play thanks to one of my immortal creatures...well it was very one sided. I offered to end the game after a couple of turns seeing as he was not getting a good feeling for how his deck played.
Strangely he has never played Traumatize against me again.
______________________________
Awesome Play #2:
3 person EDH- all three players playing one of my decks. One player is playing Group Hugs, and has permanents on the battlefield making the game state thus-
- All lands tapped for another mana that land could produce
- Mana pools did not empty at the end of a phase
- everyone was drawing 3 cards during their draw step, and that player was handing out free draws to any player he wanted.
It is fairly late in the game so we had a dozen or so lands in play. I was playing a mono black re-animator deck, and my son was playing my W/B control deck. My son and I beat each-other up for many long turns, and the balance was back and forth. In the mean time the Group Hugs player is racking up a gawd awful amount of mana in his mana pool (thanks to his Seedborn Muse and is starting to get bored- sitting at 52 life. My son and I have libraries that are getting thin, so the Mad Hippo decides to use his benevolent powers for evil, and try and win the game.
I destroyed an enchantment so now mana pools empty, and my son whacked an artifact so we are only drawing one extra card per turn. I have been dealing out the most removal, but Hippo boy decides to take out my son first by playing Blue Sun's Zenith for a large amount and puts my son's entire library in his hand. Sadly no answer was left in his deck after he had used so much ammo on me, and he was out. Next turn I am getting worried, but I draw no answer and play Cabal Coffers. Hippo boy then get's his Zenith back from the graveyard and arrogantly casts it for an amount that seemed like it would be enough to win rather than for all he could, but as I count out cards in to my graveyard I end up having three cards left in my library after the draw step on my next turn. I start looking through my deck to see if I have an answer left that I can play to pull off a win. We had been playing for hours so my ammo was nearly out too.
Finally my eyes fall on a glorious card, a card I put in the deck at the last minute "just because". I cast my eyes up to look at his available lands and am reassured that there is only a small amount of colorless mana he could produce. I count my my lands, which included Cabal Coffers, double checked my math, and tapped it all for a 54/54 Maga, Traitor to Mortals. He looked at his hand, at his lands, at his hand again, and finally up at me with a very sad-panda face and quietly says an expletive, then tells me I won.
The game had gone for three and a half hours, but we were loving every minute of it.